Thursday, July 24, 2008

Married!

Where to start…


The ceremony was absolutely exactly perfect. The weather was perfect, the music was perfect, the flowers were perfect, my bridesmaids were perfect, my dress was more than perfect, my HUSBAND was perfect, the flow & content of the ceremony was perfect, the minister’s mini-sermon was perfect and so on and so forth.

I spent the night before at my dad’s house where things were really quiet and peaceful. I wasn’t exactly wound up or anxious before going to sleep and once I did go to bed to sleep I slept beautifully, but somehow I couldn’t bring myself to go to bed and go to sleep. I knew I wanted to be rested the next day, but a part of me wanted to slow time down and enjoy every moment of the experience. I’d deliberately orchestrated everything such that all the work was done before Saturday or was going to be done by other people, so I didn’t have to do anything except get myself bathed, dressed and done-up by photos at 4:00pm. This meant a very relaxed morning with my dad, step-mom and a couple friends who had camped down by the river at my dad’s.

A relaxed morning led into an easy-going afternoon of hair, make-up, jewelry decisions, ironing dresses and other such game-day prep at my Aunt’s. Included were bridesmaids Alicia, Haley and Vaidya, and the lovely Andreana, who is the wife of the best-man Travis and was so incredibly helpful in everything leading up to the wedding. The quirky Brianna, hairdresser extraordinaire, was on hand to do up everyone’s tresses and she did a killer job. I even learned about make-up earlier in the week and managed to do it myself that afternoon. As soon as I get photos back I’ll be sure to post them!

The boys (Chris, groomsmen, bridedudes, etc) meanwhile spent the day setting up the reception and ceremony sites and all four or five or six (I’m not totally sure who all was there) showered, shaved, dressed and were out the door in 15 minutes – with only one bathroom! With the girls it took over an hour to do my hair alone!

Pictures were scheduled from 4:00-4:30 and when we arrived around 3:45 the boys were already in place. Chris was forced to keep his back to me while everyone got arranged and we had one of those “everyone see the look on his face when he sees his bride” moments. He looked beautiful and when I went up to him every single bit of his body was quivering. He almost cried, but I had to threaten him with the ruin of my make-up before we did any photos as I was barely holding it together. And if he cried there wasn’t a chance I’d be able to hold back.

Never a fan of portraits or posed photos in general we powered through the requisite formal shots in about 30 minutes even though everyone told me it could never be done that fast. I might have been a bit militant in ordering everyone around, but I didn’t want to waste my wedding day taking hours of formal shots. Stopping to take pictures has a way of bringing me out of the moment and away from what it is I'm doing.

With photos out of the way the guys and extended family members went off to the ceremony site to help greet people and shuttle them to the wedding meadow. The bridesmaids and I milled around the photo site for a while and then were driven to the ceremony site, where we hid at the end of the access road for FOREVER. Okay, it was more like 30 or 40 minutes, but it felt like forever. Throughout the day I’d had passing pangs of very intense butterflies in my stomach (to be more explicit I felt like throwing up!), but it wasn’t out of nerves, dread or apprehension. It was more due to the general emotional-intensity of the day. Waiting for the ceremony to begin I was fairly calm, but the butterflies were pretty intense. At one point my mom brought out the vodka and we had a few nips on ice – for medicinal purposes of course.

Exactly on schedule the groomsmen met us at the access road and we started to make our way along the trails, through woods and dappled sunlight, to the edge of the meadow. Though we couldn’t hear it perfectly, music from the string quartet filtered down to us. Near the meadow, but still hidden, we paused behind a fairly good screen of trees while the parents were being seated. The music paused and then started up with a lovely, lovely quartet version of Corelli’s Concerto Grosso in G-Minor, Adagio. The bridesmaids were stunning in their brightly colored, shining dresses and seemed to me like flowers gliding through the meadow. I found out later one of them stepped in a hole or divot and nearly fell, but it looked good to me at the time. As they were nearing the altar I emerged from the shadows and stood at the edge of the meadow for a moment. The Adagio ended just as the last bridesmaid lined up at the altar, there was a pause, and then Corelli’s Concerto Grosso in G-Minor, Vivace began and I started walking to my wedding. During the rehearsal my footing had been somewhat shaky and that was without a gown or dozens of people watching. For a moment, while I was paused at the edge of the meadow, I was suddenly desperate for a bridedude or groomsman to cling too, but it was too late for that so I just had to go. High heels, uneven ground and gown that hadn’t been hemmed quite enough didn’t prove to be a problem. I didn’t even look to where I was stepping, but felt completely grounded and stable. There wasn’t a chance that I might fall – and I didn’t.

I was vaguely aware of the physical details surrounding me: The friends and family, the sun and shadows on the meadow, the gorgeous kalanchoe flowers lining the aisle, beautiful bridesmaids lined up at the head of the aisle, pretty little blue bows on the chairs along the aisle, rose plants denoting the alter, music filling the meadow, color and light everywhere, and more. I was completely fixed, however, on my Christopher who stood up at the altar and then walked to meet me at the top of the aisle so we could come together to be married. He was still quivering all over when we met and we both came very close to crying again. From later reports I heard that his sister, my mom and my dad were all pretty much overwhelmed and cried through the entire ceremony. For me and Chris, and we'll assume all others as well, it was definitely tears stemming from overwhelming emotion of excitement, love, happiness, beauty, etc.

The ceremony itself was fairly short (20 minutes maybe) and included a reading by my dad who was so choked up he barely got through it, a reading by Chris’ dad that was short but funny, and a Shakespeare sonnet read by my step-dad. The minister’s remarks brought it all together, our vows were lovely and no one lost any of the rings. When it was over we scampered off to a bit from Handel’s Royal Fireworks and celebrated off in the woods with our bridal party over a bottle of VERY nice champagne.

The reception included great food, a beautiful sunset, and sparklers that burned through seven table clothes, lit Vaidya’s napkin on fire and led to the burning of her dress and singeing of mine! We’ll see what the cleaners are able to do. In general people were happy, relaxed and beautiful. Travis gave a lovely toast, Vaidya gave the best toast in the history of the universe, and my brother tried three times to give a toast, but was too emotional. Dancing and general merriment were had by all. The keg was killed half an hour before the party ended and when we brought the coolers home the next day there was a single bottle of beer left over. Only about half the wine was consumed, but wine will keep, so that isn’t a problem. In fact, we had a bottle last night in our new wine glasses.

We had a lovely, lovely evening and though we were very, very tired, even managed to enjoy our wedding night at the lovely Hotel deLuxe. Overall it was exactly what I wanted. Even the burning added some excitement and spontaneity to the evening. Masses of photos will be posted asap! Right now I've only got a very few and none from the official, professional photographer.

Wednesday, July 09, 2008

Weddingitis

Weddingitis is an inflammation or irritation of the brain due to an upcoming wedding.


Symptoms of weddingitis may include:

  • Repeated list making and reviewing of lists (examples: guests lists, email lists, RSVP lists, shower lists, thank you lists, phone lists, vendor lists, TO DO lists)
  • Inability to concentrate on anything non-wedding related
  • Difficulty falling asleep, staying asleep or resting soundly
  • Obsessive dreams concerning cake delivery, DJs, and dress alterations
  • Glazed eyes
  • Absent mindedness (example: leaving your shoes at work.)
  • Excessive doubt and the need for constant reassurance
  • A distorted frame of reference (example: calling your fiancé in the middle of a meeting because you don’t know who will walk the dog on the wedding day.)
  • A distorted sense of proportion (example: a car battery dying is felt to be akin to the end of the world)
  • Outlandish requests (example: making bridesmaids wear, and buy, an expensive piece of jewelry)
  • Erratic and dramatic mood swings


The worst cases of weddingitis may last up to two years, but even those tend to be most acute just in the days leading up to a wedding. Sudden announcements of an engagement have been known to cause minor flare-ups as well.


Generally those most susceptible to weddingitis are brides and their mothers. However, grooms, members of the wedding party, and even random guests have been known to suffer from weddingitis.


How is weddingitis treated? A getaway known as a “honeymoon vacation” can be greatly ameliorative and when the inflammation is at its worst (3-5 days prior to the wedding), patients are advised to time off work. In severe cases, weddingitis can significantly disrupt work and relationships with friends, family, or even one’s betrothed. It can also lead to unhealthy decisions such as beer, chips & ice cream for lunch. Typically weddingitis will subside naturally, but occasionally intervention may be warranted. Weddingitis should be taken seriously and those suffering from it should be treated with caution and care.