Laughing in My Sleep

Some people talk in their sleep, some walk in their sleep. I've tried a bit of both, but I've also always been into laughing in my sleep. Some people find it spooky. A former flame was pretty creeped out by it and when my step-sister was in her vamp phase it totally freaked her out to hear a shadow on the other side of the room cackling in the middle of the night for no apparent reason.

I, however, find it delightful. Consider first what it is like to wake from a nightmare. The terror, distress, loneliness, adrenaline and general miserableness. Now consider waking yourself up with your own laughter and the pure joy that brings. Because it was a dream you can't even remember why you were laughing (or maybe you just remember glimmers that light you up again) which actually makes it even better as the amusement of the situtation doesn't fade. What you have is only the amusement and joy. It is really quite splendid and just the best way to start your day.

I haven't been laughing in my sleep so much in the recent past. It has often come and gone when I've been going through either particularly trying times or particularly enlivening times. I won't go into details of what has been going on, but I realized some time ago that it has been quite a while since my last bout of sleep laughing.

That said, yesterday I woke myself up laughing and had vague memories of laughing throughout the night!

I don't want to attribute it only to the wholeness program I've been doing here at the Isha Yoga Center in Coimbatore, India, but it is a piece of it for sure. I've created a lot of drastic changes in my life in the last three weeks (my goodness, it has only been just over three weeks since my last day of work and when my life was horribly intact!) The program here is only a piece, but it is a very wonderful piece I think - sort of like some really stellar fertilizer for a newly tilled and designed garden. It might even be some of the seeds or saplings - we'll see.

I really like yoga, natural foods, "harmonious living" and all that jazz. I think it can be phenomenal. Unfortunately it quite often gets distorted into very hippy-dippy, mumbo-jumbo, new agey crap (yes crap!) that is just plain silly at times. Not always, and maybe not even mostly, but often. Its essence, however, is great and my time here at Isha has been amazing. I don't want to even try to put 8 full (and I mean FULL) experiential days into words so I'll leave with a few words that will probably sound boarderline hippy dippy and then leave you with a list of some of the small details of being here that have been lovely.

Overall, I feel like being here has helped me refocus how I exist in my mind, in my body and on this planet. It has helped me reconnect with a sense of joy I've always had but somehow lost direct contact with (or maybe was getting pushed into a smaller and smaller place in me?) as time progressed along and I got distracted by challenging life experiences. The program has been incredibly challenging and the changes I'm making I'm sure will continue to be challenging, but I'm really looking forward to it.

So now some lovely details:

* Dinner Saturday night - we came out just after sunset to the garden around the main hall of the ashram. All over the grass, the out wall, in the tree, along benches, everywhere, were little candles. It was so beautiful and magical.

* The gronds of Isha itself. The buildings are beautiful, the gardens beautiful, the ponds with the lily pads, the temple, the housing. It is all simple, but elegant and in harmony with its surroundings (both geographical and people in the village wise.)

* Live music - Sounds of Isha - in the evenings after dinner before our evening sessions with Sadguru. I can't even describe it, but I bought a CD of it and if you send me a love note I'll burn a copy and mail it to you :)

* Games. We play games. Or rather, when I'm not crippled by naseau, diarrhea and fever I play. Grown-ed ups don't play enough games. They are fun.

* Dancing Tuesday evening. With a huge bonfire in the gardens and live music, people at the ashram (program participants, volunteers and permanent members, including families and children) danced like something from a surreal Bollywood film. There was such excitement and energy and joy in it all!

* FROGS! There are a lot of frogs around here. There is a little pond (little little, man-made) right outside my room and there are some frogs that kick-it there on a regular basis. Big ones and littler ones.

* Elephants. Supposedly elephants. There are supposed to be wild jungle elephants in the woods around here. Don't wear white, it makes them irrate.

* The nice doctor who gave me a shot in the butt to stop my vomitting saturday night (or sunday morning I should say as it was 3am or something.)

* The mountains! My goodness - how to describe.... Huge mountains that yogis have done all sorts of spiritual things up in. The clouds slither over them in the most beautiful way.

* The stars. No big cities near by so the stars are AMAZING.

* The lightening storm Sunday evening/night when I was still feverish and too sick to move.

* So much more, but I have already been an internet pig (there is one computer wtih internet here for alllllll the peoples.)